Yesterday I posted a picture of my sister, Sally, and her husband, Dave, with Bob & me. Only 3 people have clicked “like” on that post which was titled “Speaking to Dementia.” I think it was a post that deserves a lot more views and “likes”than that. In it I posted some tips on how I was able to get a few words and a smile out of my sister while we were on a ZOOM meeting.
Also, I resposted some tips from our niece, Tammy, who is a nurse, about some do’s and don’ts when communicating with people who have dementia or Alzheimer’s.
I am not going to create a new post today… but instead, in a “Throwback Thursday,” I am asking you to click on “Speaking to Dementia” over on the right margin… and take a few minutes to review this crucial subject. You just never know when you might be the one who needs this information next!
How do you speak – especially during social distancing – with a loved one who has dementia?
My sister, Sally, has dementia. She lives in a Masonic Home less than five minutes from her daughter, Jodie. It’s in Pennsylvania – a loooong ways from me in Montana! But, even though they are close, in today’s pandemic world, Jodie can’t go to visit her. Sally is on the second floor of the care facility and when Jodie drives to see her, she is not even allowed out of her car. They just have to wave to one another out their windows.
I am sure that is a very smart safety precaution on the part of the Masonic Home. Jodie just tested positive for the virus last week! Now she is in quarantine for two weeks.
Finding Assistance
On Sunday I had my first ZOOM meeting with my sis. Rochelle, the Activities Director facilitated the meeting. Sally was basically non-responsive, so it was hard to know what to say. Rochelle repeated my comments to be sure Sally heard, but even then I barely got a nod most of the time. Still, it was good to see her.
Do You Relate?
Do you have a parent or sibling, a neighbor or friend with dementia? If so, you know what I mean. You’ve been in my shoes, and you long to be up close and personal with your loved one so you can look into each other’s eyes and make real connections.
Here are Bob and me with my sis, Sally, and her husband, Dave, waaaay back in the days of flat-tops, skinny ties and thighs, and 3″ heels! It must have been Easter … we’re all decked out. I will send her this photo. Dave died of a massive heart-attack more than 20 years ago. Pictures are an important way to tap into memories.
Using Technology to Tap Memories
I took my laptop out on the porch and showed Sally our scene of the mountains. I reminded her of the Thanksgivings we have spent together here sitting on the porch (or looking out this window), enjoying that view. Still, no change of facial expression and no words. Maybe it’s because the ground and mountains are often snow-covered in November!
Our view from the deck
View from back porch
Don’t Give Up – Keep Trying!
I talked about our times together at various Thanksgivings around the dining room table and showed her that scene. She has visited us in November at least ten years in a row before she needed to go to assisted living and wisely chose to be near her daughter and grandson.
I reminded her of Gloria, our friend who joined us one Thanksgiving. She nodded as if she remembered Gloria.
I reminded her of other meal times the two of us have had together. No response… but a picture is worth a thousand words. I will send this one to her.
Reach Way Back
Reaching back into the cobwebs of my brain, I remembered us as young girls sitting on our grandmother’s porch, reaching out into the “weeds” and finding stalks of sweet anise, breaking them off, and munching on them like you might snack on a stalk of celery.
Actually, I still love to munch on sweet anise. I remembered I have some in the refrigerator. So, I went with my laptop over to the kitchen. I opened the fridge and asked Sally if she remembered sitting on Grandma’s porch, nibbling on this while we waited for mom to come and get us after school.
When I showed her the sweet anise (commonly known today as fennel), I got my first real smile from her. She nodded. Ah, folks, smells and food are great memory triggers!!
Do you know this bulb? Fennel or sweet anise tastes like celery flavored with black licorice.
The greatest trigger for memory when you are visiting with a loved one who has dementia is music. Find an old tune. Dig out that old pair of shoes that might bring back memories and play the sweet old songs that mom used to sing to us.
Study and Seek advice
Today on Facebook, my niece Tammy, who is a registered nurse and works with many Alzheimer’s patients, posted this helpful reminder:
Apply What You Learn – Reach Out
I have a friend in our nursing home here in Ennis who has dementia. During this COVID-19 pandemic, the residents have been on lock-down. No visitors. No outings. But recently, the nursing home constructed a “Visiting Booth.” It’s a little 8′ x8′ structure with a roof, two side walls (north and south), an opening to the east. It has a plexiglass partition to the west.
On a sunny day this week I called the nursing home and scheduled a visit with my friend. The nursing home arranges half hour visitations. At the appointed time, the CNA, Bonney, wheeled the resident (my friend) out into the fresh air and into the booth. I sat on the outside of the plexiglass on a park bench. It was hard to hear, but Bonney did what Rochelle had done for my sister and me. She repeated to my friend whatever I said.
I brought my laptop and my cell phone. Used the cell phone “hot spot” to connect to the internet. Logged on to a five year old video of my friend’s daughter singing and playing the SAW in a church service. Bonney brought the laptop into the booth and held it close to my friend. Of course, she thoroughly enjoyed seeing her daughter, hearing that beautiful, inspiring song, and visiting with me about things we had done together in years past.
I left with a song in my heart at the end of our visiting time. I couldn’t figure out how to get the video of Peggy and her saw from my FB page to this post. But, I found Peggy with her violin singing and playing “How Great is Our God” with Jordy Christo, on You.Tube, so I’ll post that here.
If you go to http://www.facebook.com/janbeekman you can find the “Amazing Grace” video with Peggy and her saw. It’s worth the click and your time. This is what it’ll look like when you get there:
I pray that you are inspired to reach out to someone today who needs to hear from you.
We may be limited by this pandemic, but we are not frozen. Do what you can to brighten someone’s day!
This was always true of Sally. She’s 14 months older than I am… Always responsible and well-behaved!
Cheers from the irresponsible little sister!!
See ya tomorrow. Have a Wonderful Wednesday. Love and Hugs… Stay Well!! JanBeek
Don’t laugh at others Who are faced with challenges. Seek to understand.
We are divided In this world that’s filled with hate. Why can’t we just love?
It’s intolerance And a lack of compassion That sows evil seeds.
People point fingers At those they see as different. Let’s see their beauty!
People point their guns At differing opinions. Let’s just live and learn!
Learn to see others As God’s children; we’re the same. Let’s make love “catching!”
I had not heard this song before Peter, Paul & Mary made it famous (I think it was back in the late 60s – early 70s). I love their version of it, but some of the words were hard to understand. Now that I have heard the song writer, Mark Willis, sing it, and I have seen the lyrics, I logged on to the Peter, Paul and Mary version and wondered why I ever had trouble understanding.
With their chosen video clips on this You.Tube, I dare you to listen and look and let it soak in and NOT cry!!
Oh, my dear blog friends, How can we bury the hate? Make love contagious!
Look at these dear ones – See into their hearts and souls Through Jesus glasses.
Look at your neighbors; Really see the ones in need. Then reach out in love!
Photo by Judita Tamou0161iu016bnaitu0117 on Pexels.com
My heart is hurting For the disenfranchised ones. What’s YOUR handicap?
I’m short… I’m dense… I barely matter at all… Don’t laugh at me!
See ya tomorrow. I’m headed to my follow-up appointment with my surgeon. You have a safe, healthy, and meaningful day… And see who’s out there who needs a helping hand.
Faithful is a Yellowstone moose. He’s 14 years old! When our granddaughter, Faith, was about 10 years old, she visited us here in Montana. As a family, we visited Yellowstone Park. She and her three siblings each were given a little money to select a souvenir from the gift shop. As kids typically do, they chose something for themselves. But, Faith was not typical. She selected this moose – and gave it to me as a present … a thank you for their visit.
Today is Faith and her husband, Kyle’s wedding anniversary. They were married a year ago. Faith is as thoughtful a young lady as she was as a little ten-year-old. Every morning I say a special prayer for Faith and Kyle as I make my bed, and put “Faithful” back in his central place of honor in front of the pillows.
Fourteen years has taken its toll on Old Faithful. His hat is torn – and it was chewed a little by TazE when she was a puppy. But still, I cherish this little stuffed moose.
I tuck the torn hat in under his antler and ask the Lord,
“Please watch over Faith and Kyle. Tuck them under Your wings, O Lord, just as I tuck Faithful’s hat under his ear. Give them health and happiness, love and longevity. Keep them safe. And help them lean on Your love and their Faithfulness this day and every day. Amen.”
Happy 1st Anniversary, Faith and Kyle.
May they love with a universal love – always generous, compassionate, grateful and hopeful, brave and forgiving, proud and yet humble.
Here is Faith – on her wedding day – dancing with her dad, our son, Ty.
Do you have children? Or grandchildren? How about great-grandchildren? The most important gift you can give them is the gift of daily prayer.
God bless you, Faith and Kyle. And both our children and their families. Yes, we are so blessed. Thank You, God, for You are always FAITHFUL!
There were two d’Versepoets.com prompts for today. The instructions are “Write a piece of prose (flash fiction, memoir, nonfiction) that is 144 words or less and includes, word-for-word, ONE of the lines indicated above from Carl Sandburg’s Jazz Fantasia. I chose this line: “… a red moon rides on the humps of the low river hills.”
Successful Independence Day
It is a hot July 4th afternoon. My husband and I are on the shady side of the bleachers. Across the arena sun-lovers shade their eyes and strain to see the gate open as the rider emerges on the hump of an angry, cinched bucking bronco.
One by one they buck out of the gates. The audience holds its breath as the rider tries to stay on the required number of minutes before the whistle blows and they are free to dismount. Too often, the rider is bucked off before the whistle. We pray no one gets trampled as the clowns emerge to divert the horse’s attention and the rider scrambles out of harm’s way.
Back home in the pasture, the horse nibbles its reward as a red moon rides on the humps of the low river hills. Another successful Independence Day!
Yesterday I posted my sermon notes on a blog titled, “We All are Good AND Bad.” Today’s devotional in my Daily Guideposts was a wonderful follow-up to that topic… and a terrific antidote!
In today’s Daily Guideposts 2020 devotional, Erin Janoso shared a story about her daughter finding an owl pellet. She wrote:
“Owls don’t have teeth, so they often swallow their food whole.Because of this, they end up eating things like feathers and fur that are indigestible – and some stuff like bones – that could puncture their tender digestive systems. Luckily for the owl, it has a gizzard that acts as a shield… sifting what is nourishing from what is not.”
“… unlike the owl, whose body acts involuntarily, I can forget how desperately I need God’s help sorting what’s nourishing from what’s not. “I looked again at the gray mass lying on the table (the owl pellet). If an owl’s gizzard could put such an end to the things that would harm it, imagine what God could do for me, if ony I remembered to ask.”
We all are human So we all are imperfect Good and bad combined
Today’s sermon drummed home that point to us. Rev. Steve Hundley at our Madison Valley Presbyterian Church here in Ennis, Montana, used this scripture to springboard into the message for today:
Matthew 13:24-30; 36-43 The Parable of the Weeds
24 Jesus told them another parable: “The kingdom of heaven is like a man who sowed good seed in his field. 25 But while everyone was sleeping, his enemy came and sowed weeds among the wheat, and went away. 26 When the wheat sprouted and formed heads, then the weeds also appeared.
27 “The owner’s servants came to him and said, ‘Sir, didn’t you sow good seed in your field? Where then did the weeds come from?’
28 “‘An enemy did this,’ he replied.
“The servants asked him, ‘Do you want us to go and pull them up?’
29 “‘No,’ he answered, ‘because while you are pulling the weeds, you may uproot the wheat with them. 30 Let both grow together until the harvest. At that time I will tell the harvesters: First collect the weeds and tie them in bundles to be burned; then gather the wheat and bring it into my barn.’”
The Parable of the Weeds Explained
36 Then he left the crowd and went into the house. His disciples came to him and said, “Explain to us the parable of the weeds in the field.”
37 He answered, “The one who sowed the good seed is the Son of Man. 38 The field is the world, and the good seed stands for the people of the kingdom. The weeds are the people of the evil one, 39 and the enemy who sows them is the devil. The harvest is the end of the age, and the harvesters are angels.
40 “As the weeds are pulled up and burned in the fire, so it will be at the end of the age. 41 The Son of Man will send out his angels, and they will weed out of his kingdom everything that causes sin and all who do evil. 42 They will throw them into the blazing furnace, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth. 43 Then the righteous will shine like the sun in the kingdom of their Father. Whoever has ears, let them hear.
You know I like to take poetic notes as I listen to the sermon each Sunday. Here are my notes, taken during today’s message:
The Message – “So What About the Weeds?”
Gardens are lot of trouble. The weeds grow more than flowers. The weeds choke out vegetables. Why do weeds have such powers?
Jesus says the garden is the world, And in it the devil plants seeds. His are never flowers or veggies; They are nothing but nasty weeds,
There has always been – and always will be – Weeds – the stuff planted by sin. Weeds, tares, or wild rye Looks like wheat and mixes in.
The wild rye is actually poisonous, But we can’t tell one from the other. Just like us – who try to judge The authenticity of our sisters and brothers.
Our “weed pulling” – ridding us of enemies – Is a job some think is ours. We try to separate the good from the bad, As if calling out evil is in our powers.
Trouble is we each have wheat and weeds. We’re all a part evil and a part good. Who is capable of separating the weeds? It’s not our job. Leave ’em. We should!
Sometimes trying to eliminate sin Is a process that has reverse effects. We inadvertently pull of the flowers, Those beautiful people our Lord protects.
Too much weeding can rob people Of the right to hear the Gospel and read The Words Jesus spoke to us all: “Do not judge.” Risk the weeds as you plant Good seeds.
Can you bee an artist? Maybe you already are! How about beeing a bee artist?
We may not all be endowed with the skill to play the piano like this, or … (hang in there and keep listening)… another guy plays the Flight of the BumbleBee on several different sized trombones. It just gets more and more unbelievable. WOW!!! It’ll leave you smiling. How does he do that?
Maybe your artistic talent doesn’t lean toward music, but you’re good at painting and drawing. You can bee a bee artist like Luisa Fernanda Otero Prada. Isn’t this colorful art enchanting?
Here is another bee by artist Luisa Fernanda Otero Prada
Sometimes it’s not music or painting or drawing that makes us artists, but the ability to write – to put words together creatively for entertainment or education, inspiration or just to vent. I recently found a new blogger named Amy who wrote about bees on her post:
I wrote her and told her she was “spot on” about the health benefits of honey, but honey doesn’t make good candles! They’re ineffective and sticky and they don’t burn. Nope! It’s the bees wax, not the honey. She was kind and wrote back to say she believed me :o)
I have written on the subject of bees many times, too, because (as many of you know), my husband Bob is a retired beekeeper. With a name like Beekman (Bee-keeper-man), how could he bee otherwise?
Bob grew up on a “Honey Farm” and learned the relationship between natural honey and good health at a very young age. “Bee”ing a good beekeeper is an art of its own!!
I found some pictures from the family farm on this search: https://www.yelp.com/biz/beekman-and-beekman-hughson But discovered that internet site name is “unclaimed.” Hmmm… I know they have a website that has been claimed. I’ll have to keep looking.
This is definitely the honey that was produced by the bees of Bob & his brother, Bruce, (and now his nephew, Matt) and it is bottled and sold at the ranch in Hughson, California in their tasting room. Bruce’s wife, Ann, is the brains and creativity behind the Tasting Room/Honey House and the Beekman&Beekman label.
Matt’s wife, Sarah, is actively involved with him as a beekeeper. She raises queens (that’s a topic for a future blog) and she travels with him to North Dakota where Matt & Sarah take some of their bees for the summer. She’s a wonderful example of a mom who cooks with honey!
It’s an art to create an attractive label and an inviting “Honey House” and it is an art to be a good salesperson! It’s an art to take beautiful photos of people, products and places.
California sage – by Beekman and Beekman
Beekman & Beekman Honey farm also has lavender products and a beautiful field of lavender just south of the house.
Bee Honey Wise
I kept searching and I did find the actual Beekman family website at http://www.beekmanandbeekman.com … It’s been 15 years since Bob retired as a partner in this bee business, but honey runs through our veins after a lifetime with bees and beekeeping!
On the Beekman website I found a link to another way to Bee an Artist… Culinary Arts! There is a link to “Cooking with Honey” that gives you tips on how to do so successfully.
Go to the website and learn more!
Bob reminded me that Bruce & Matt are not the only Beekman beekeepers and that I should not forget to mention his nephew, Bryan, who is one of California’s largest beekeepers. He has over 10,000 hives that he places all over California’s central valley, mid-coast, and southern CA. Bryan and his wife, Michele, also have a honey sales room. In the area outside Fresno, CA, the Honey Hut is a unique place in Sanger, CA. You should consider visiting it if you are ever in that area. You can learn more about Bryan at http://www.fcfb.org/About-Us/BoardMembers/Beekman.php
Bryan and his cousin, Matt, are members of co-op, Sioux Bee Honey.
You can Bee an Artist in so many ways – with:
Music
Visual Arts
The Written Word
Culinary Arts
Photography
What can you add?
Bee Clever!!!
Have a BEEutiful Sunday. Go to church and worship God! Thank Him for all the artists who enhance our lives!
Baby robins often hover Near the nest that was their home. Soon they’ll spread their wings And farther they will roam.
Like those little robins, Our children need to fly – Spread their wings and explore The vastness of the sky.
But in this COVID world, We’ve lost the freedom to soar. Our children may be caught Somewhere – longing for more.
Chris & Natala
If you’ve followed my blog for a year or more, you’ve met this young couple before. They are my grandson, Chris, from Switzerland, and the love of his life, Natalia, who lives in Colombia. Just before this pandemic hit us, Chris traveled to Colombia to meet his on-line girlfriend and her family in person. Now, the two must tuck in their wings and live with the limitations again of on-line romance. Neither is free to travel and face-to-face with the other.
Hope and Sam
When they were 2 and 4, this brother-sister duo joined our family. Hope Morgan and Samuel Leland were in foster care and God knew they needed to be Beekmans! Now Hope lives here – only a hour from us in Big Sky – and Samuel (who has special needs) had been living happily in a group home near Sacramento. They are now in their late 20’s.
Hope has two of our three great-grandchildren.
Sienna, GG and Xander
Samuel, in the group home, has been in a quarantine mode since this pandemic hit. Life is pretty empty when you can’t go out – and you can’t have visitors. Some of you may know the feeling. Family Connections are SO important!
Beekman Family
Family Gatherings
Years ago, when the grandchildren were teens, we would often drive or fly to be together as a family. Now the family is spread out over several states and even across into Europe. Family Connections are sooo important to us! We live in Montana, and this group shot was taken at a gathering in California.
In the picture above you see (l to r) nephew Zak, Samuel, Bob’s sister Bonnie, her husband Stan, sister-in-law Ann beside Bob’s brother, Bruce, granddaughter Faith with her sister Hope (I’m between them), Bob, grandson Jordan, and behind him – daughter-in-law Monika (mom of Sam, Jordan, Hope & Faith) and lastly, Bob’s sister-in-law Marge. I think our son, Ty was taking the picture.
Yes, Family Connections are important to all of us!!
Gathering the Flock
When will we be able to gather the flock again? Is there a foreseeable end to this isolation?
Ty and Monika were so concerned about Sam and his isolation in the group home that they went yesterday to get him. He is now living back in the nest! God bless them for responding to the felt need!
Sam (left) with two friends at Sam’s high school graduation
Returning to the Nest
Sam may not be able to hug friends and visit up close during this pandemic, but at least from his home, he has his parents to hug, and he can see friends from a safe social distance. He is no longer isolated. Social connections are so important to our mental and physical health!
So, unlike the robin parents, We are free to go and rescue. Thank you, Ty and Monika, For returning Sam to the nest and to you!
God bless you!
Have a Happy Weekend. I hope you have opportunities to make Family Connections. Tell me about them!
