Loving One Another

Archive for the ‘respect’ Category

Cherish Aging


I have a journal titled, “I Can and I Will … Watch Me!”

I don’t write in it every day; just when I am inspired by something else “I Can” do that “I DID!” Some of my topics are I CAN:

  • Emerge
  • Participate
  • Heal
  • Remember
  • Bee Positive
  • Taste
  • Encourage

You get the idea…



Today my topic was I CAN “Cherish Aging.” I was inspired by my experience last Tuesday at Big Sky Ski Resort while I sat at the bar, sipping my Irish coffee, and enjoying my book.

“You remind me of my grandma,”
The young waitress smiled and said,
“She was a little, compassionate lady
Who loved me dearly – and was too soon dead.”

She told me of her virtues, her illness,
And her faith. Tears filled her eyes.
She told me how she missed her hugs –
And their long talks. Grandma was quite wise.

Then, wiping away the teardrops,
She went on about her job.
Soon she returned with a piece of apple pie
On which was a big whipped cream blob.

“I thought you’d like this little treat;
My grandma sure loved apple pie,”
She gave me a hug and rushed away.
Now it was my turn to cry.

I don’t mind t all growing older
If my wrinkles and my silver hair
Can bring cherished memories to someone
And make them know: Us Grandmas Care!

Look at these wonderful Pexels.com photographs of various grandmothers:

Photo by Luizmedeirosph on Pexels.com
Photo by Edu Carvalho on Pexels.com
Photo by Sayan Ghosh on Pexels.com
Photo by Juan Pablo Serrano Arenas on Pexels.com
Photo by Immortal shots on Pexels.com
Photo by Dazzle Jam on Pexels.com
Photo by Himesh Mehta on Pexels.com
Photo by Yulia Rozanova on Pexels.com

The one above is my daughter-in-law, Monika, with my great-granddaughter, Cosette. Monika’s a young, loving grandmother … See, not all gramas are silver-haired and wrinkled!

Look back at those grandmas. Which one touches your heart the most? Do any of them remind you of YOUR grandma? Tell me about her!

Here I am with Xander and Sienna.

Do CHERISH AGING!
It brings with it
many blessings and joys.

And the alternative?
Don’t go there young!!

See ya later.

Practicing for Divorce


No, I am not practicing for divorce!
After 58 eventful years of marriage, it’s too late to give up now!!

February 11, 1962

But life is not a bed of roses (or carnations!)
And marriage is not easy!
Nobody promised it would be.

Photo by freestocks.org on Pexels.com

Sometimes we get mad at one another.
Sometimes we disappoint one another.
Sometimes we don’t understand
where the other one is coming from!

Yes, I make Bob wonder lots of times!

What Families Know

In his devotional today on Bayside Church’s on-line “Refuel,”
Andrew McCourt talked about marriage and relationships.


He titled his message, “What Families Know,” and he said,

“People who aren’t married do married things…
they are lovers practicing for divorce.”

It’s an age-old problem!

Love Without Commitment

For as long as life began – back to the days of Adam and Eve – men and women have found a way to “find each other’s cracks.” And eventually pouring into that crack can burst the container!

Eve found Adam’s crack!
And look what happened…

Andrew McCourt offered some suggestions for how to relate to one another in genuine love that does not seek to “find the crack” – but rather seeks to FILL AND FULFILL.

Andrew said something to this effect,

“What successful married folks know is this:
there is an order to successful relationships.

First, you stand together shoulder to shoulder
(Don’t let kids or anyone else get between you).

Second, you stand or sit together face-to-face
(You look each other in the eye and you communicate).

Third, you do the bellybutton-to-bellybutton thing
(You love each other emotionally and physically).”

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Reverse Order

Andrew said, “When we get that order of things reversed, that’s when we start Practicing for Divorce.”

When did this whole thing of living together first to try it out before getting married come into being?

I have a biased (informed, of course) opinion about that! I think “Three’s Company” is the culprit.

Photo by Fikayo Aderoju on Pexels.com

Living Together Out of Wedlock

I couldn’t find a picture of those three folks (a guy and two gals) who lived together in an apartment in NYC on a TV show back in the 70’s or early 80’s, but it was funny and popular and it made it look like it was okay for unmarried people of the opposite sex to live together. “Three’s Company” was one of my mom’s favorite shows. And she would be considered a prude by today’s standards.

When my niece lived with a guy before marriage in NYC, my mom said it was a great idea because it made her safer in an unsafe city!

See how media can change our idea of right and wrong?

Ah, here: I found a video. It was a darling TV show!

Bayside’s “Refuel” Podcast

If you want to hear Andrew McCourt himself
and his actual words on the subject,
try this link:
bit.ly/devo021020
I have that on my iPhone and it takes me there.

On With My Day

‘Tis time for me to get on with my day. Tomorrow is our actual anniversary… 58 years. It’s not always been a bed of roses, but the key ingredient always has been there:

RESPECT

Yup, that’s the bottom line!
So, whatever your relationship…
whether it’s three’s company,
living with your lover,
or married,
keep that RESPECT alive!

And there are a few other tips
for how to keep from practicing for divorce, too.
I’ll save those for tomorrow.

Thanks for visiting JanBeek
I hope I haven’t offended any of you out there.

See ya later!

Universal Wisdom


I found this “Japanese Wisdom” on Facebook. People had commented about it and clicked their “likes” and “loves” and “sad” … and that one person who was “sad” was probably the one who wrote an irate comment denouncing the title.

Oh my, how sad that someone would see this
and be incensed that the Japanese took ownership!
Hey, I don’t care who thought it up first,
I just love it.
And I think it is more than true:
“If you don’t know, shut up!”

There is no reason to be offended by something as clever and universal as this. Just embrace it!

I am headed to have breakfast and go to church.
I will pray for that caustic person
who was offended to have a peace-filled day.
“If it’s not nice, don’t say or write it!”

Have a blessed Sunday.

Photo by nicollazzi xiong on Pexels.com

See ya later.

Be on the Upside


Morning Routine

Do you have a morning routine?

I get up, take my meds with a full glass of water, make a cup of coffee, and go up to my sanctuary.

Each morning in my sanctuary, I have a routine of quiet time, prayer, meditation, Bible Study, and devotional reading. One of my favorite devotionals is Guideposts Magazine.

Guideposts Magazine

This month’s Guideposts (Feb. 2020) is featuring upbeat stories about times in our USA history when the nation came together in unity. If you have followed my blog this week, you know UNITY is high on my list of priorities. When we are unified as a people, we can accomplish so much good!

Being unified allows us to gather strength from one another. Unity means fighting FOR one another, lifting one another up with dignity, living on the UPSIDE of life! “The Up Side” is one of my favorite features in Guideposts Magazine.

Each of those quotes are sufficient for a full day’s topic.

  • Make a Difference
  • Rinse and Repeat
  • God Grins Back
  • Optimism
  • Life’s Too Short

Look for those on my blog as this week progresses.
And have an UPSIDE DAY!

I’m off to volunteer at the Senior Center.
See ya tomorrow.

Let's Be Whole!


We are a divided country.
The words “they” and “them”
are heard more frequently today
than ever before in my 80 years of life.

What is causing this?
And what can we do about it?
Here is one man’s suggestion.
I think it is so true.

Right on!
It’s as true in China (where the Corona virus is rampant,
and citizens are bravely speaking out against
a government that acted slowly
on the knowledge of the virus),
as it is in the USA where
election rhetoric
is hateful and divisive.

So how do we begin to “fight for each other?”

From his prison cell in Rome, Paul wrote to the people of Colosse. He had visited there before his imprisonment. His letter to them in the book of Colossians was written to encourage them, just as we, the people of this divided world, need encouragement today.

Colossians 2: 1-3
“I want you to know how much I am struggling for you… and for all those who have not met me personally. My purpose is that they may be encouraged in heart, and united in love, so they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.”

Colossians 2:8
“See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of the world rather than on Christ.”

Colossians 3:12-14
“Therefore… clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive what ever grievances you may have against one another… And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

Photo by Wendy van Zyl on Pexels.com

Yes, the Bible has words of wisdom, words of advise for ALL in times of trouble. We need only open its pages to find scripture that directs our paths toward the unity we all seek. In Colossians, Paul tells us to put on:

  • compassion
  • kindness
  • humility
  • gentleness
  • patience
  • LOVE

… and in so doing, we will find the peace of Christ living in our hearts.
We are members of one body.
We are ONE.
We need to know that without a doubt
and act accordingly.

Don’t let hateful rhetoric divide our oneness
into the “they-them” and “we-us” mentality!

We’re all in this together.
Let’s be whole!

Thanks for visiting JanBeek.


Have a Marvelous, Love-filled Monday!

See ya tomorrow.

Keeping in Touch


Do you enjoy keeping in touch with long-time friends?

This morning I posted “No Friend Like an Old Friend”
with pictures of the long-time friends I met with yesterday.

Among the long-time friends I posted pictures of
was Ly, my favorite hair stylist, whom I have
known since 1979. Today she gave me a new hair cut and
helped me get my “perky” back.

Also, today I had the privilege of reconnecting with dear friends from my years of working in the Ceres Unified School District. I was Caswell Elementary School’s principal from 1988-1997. Some of my favorite people to work with met me today for lunch. Most of them also are retired now. What a joy!!

Jackie (wonderful 3rd grade teacher),
Maudie (extraordinary instructional aide),
Fernando (he and his brother, Louie, were the world’s greatest custodians)
& Marge (Support staff leader & Resource Teacher
who helped coordinate this gathering)
Dora (impressive & dedicated first grade teacher)
and Kim (superb sixth grade teacher)
Jess (loving special ed teacher)
& Candy (beloved special ed instructional aide)
JoAnn (one of the best secretaries anywhere)
& JoAnn’s son, Kenny (I remember him as a kindergartener!)
Me (before haircut) with Peggy (everybody’s favorite Reading and Resource Teacher)
She was my go-to person
whenever I screwed up and needed help recovering from some difficult learning experience!

Have you had the opportunity to reconnect 20 years later with co-workers who were instrumental in tour personal and professional growth? If so, you know what a JOY and a privilege this day was for me.

If not, I pray you will live 20 years into your retirement and have the delight of reconnecting the way I did today. It was indescribably wonderful.
I wish you this kind of joy.

Thank you, dear Caswellians, for a wonderful day.
I love you!

Come visit me in Montana!

Walk Away


Reblogged with permission from Audrey Kletscher Helbling

“Sometimes you just have to walk away… January 9, 2020

Filed under: Uncategorized — Audrey Kletscher Helbling @ 12:56 PM
Tags: compassion, empathy, listening, thoughts, understanding

An especially bright spot in the heart of downtown Faribault is the Second Street Garden, a pocket garden with positive messages like this one. Minnesota Prairie Roots edited file photo August 2019.

BY NATURE, I AM a quiet observer. Not introverted. But a watcher, a listener, the person who mostly sits back, especially in a room filled with strong personalities.

But that doesn’t mean I embrace overpowering people, especially those who talk over and at others. That type of self-centered behavior bothers me, bothers being a tempered word choice. Lack of empathy, understanding and compassion hurt personal relationships, communities, countries. I see too many people driven by their goals, their agendas, their misinformed/uninformed assessments of others and of situations. Their “I’m right” and “I don’t care if I’m hurting you” perspectives.

How do you fix that on a personal level? The answer: We usually can’t. I’ve learned that unless someone is willing to engage in civil dialogue, it’s probably a waste of time to even have a discussion. I can only control how I react. And sometimes the best way to react is simply to walk away, to let it go, to extract myself from those who are toxic, who lack empathy and the ability to think beyond themselves.

The Minnesota Nice part of me screams, “That’s not very nice!” But the reality is that we all deserve respect. To be heard and understood and loved. Every. Single. One. Of. Us.

THOUGHTS?

© Copyright 2020 Audrey Kletscher Helbling

My thought on this blog is that Audrey is so right! As a culture, we seem (in the USA) to be losing sight of common courtesy. We seem to be forgetting the power of mutual respect. We seem to be going down a rat hole… and it’s not pretty!

So, Audrey’s blog spoke to me. We DO have a choice. We do not have to travel down that ugly hole. We can walk away “from those who are toxic, who lack empathy and the ability to think beyond themselves.”

I posted “Walk with Me” a couple of days ago. It was a physical walk around our beautiful neighborhood here in Rancho Mirage, CA. Yesterday Bob & I walked around the beautiful polo grounds in the La Quinta/Indio area.

El Dorado Polo field
The geese at El Dorado Polo field lake
Geese and ducks are plentiful there.
Last time we were here (a year ago), they were planting a lot more palm trees here.
The trees are beautiful, aren’t they?
The geese walked away when they saw us coming!
But they just sat at the water’s edge. So beautiful!
It was a beautiful day for walking. Temperatures in the low 70’s.
As we headed back to Rancho Mirage, we drove into the gathering clouds,but they didn’t bring rain… just a little wind.

Today, I am walking again… but this time, it is around a desert path in Thousand Palms. I send funny little kisses to you… from Snapchat … with a tooth in the way. Oh my!

Thank you, Audrey, for your thoughtful blog. I am taking it to heart. If there are toxic people out there, intent on spreading hate, I am walking again…

… Not around the neighborhood or the lake or the desert, but walking way from hate and disrespect.

You with me?

See ya later!

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