For = before Give = before receiving Ness = before receiving give
N ever E xpect S atisfaction S imultaneously
Is there someone out there who has wronged you?
Have they treated you so badly, so unjustly, that you are having a hard time forgiving them?
Do you wish you could, and you’ve tried, but you just can’t find the grace to give them that satisfaction?
Do they deserve your unforgiving spirit?
Do they deserve a pay back?
Do you wish you could get even?
Would it serve them right!?
Serve them right if you never forgave them because they don’t deserve to be let off the hook?
Who’s caught on that hook anyway?
They may not even know they hurt you!
That happened to me once. I had a person who was a teacher in a different school. I used to be in the district office and now I was happily and obliviously back in the confines of my own classroom, loving every day with those darling children, putting those two years of district office administration behind me. It had been a tough time. Satisfying opportunities mixed with struggles to satisfy all the new teachers (K-12) who were required to come to my PETAL workshops.
P rinciples of E ffective T eaching A nd L earning
I enjoyed working with the new teachers, trying to help them be the best they could be. But, inevitably, you can’t please everybody, right? Not every one of them thought what I was teaching was useful to them. I probably rubbed some the wrong way. They’d prefer to be in their classrooms preparing for the next day, rather than being at a required workshop in “The Ivory Tower.” Do you relate?
No, they were not all smiles! But I did my best… and I got back to the classroom where I could interact daily with children as fast as I could! The District Office was waaay too far from children!
Then, “that happened to me!” A knock on my door at home one evening. When I answered it, there stood a teacher who had been in a series of my workshops. I invited him in. We sat on the sofa. He was nervous.
“I want you to know I forgive you,” he said.
I didn’t know I needed forgiveness. I didn’t know I had done something to offend him. I am sure my face registered shock.
“I have been harboring a grudge against you for two years,” he said. “I am going to a counselor for a lot of unresolved issues in my life, and my counselor said I need to resolve them.”
So he was in my living room, sitting next to me, letting me know I was forgiven.
I should have asked why. I should have asked him to explain what I did. But, I was too dumb-founded. I’m not sure I wanted to know. Let bygones be bygones, you know?
I just told him I was sorry for whatever I unknowingly did to offend him. I told him I held no ill feelings about him. Never did! I accepted his forgiveness. We hugged. He left.
That young man had been given the courage to confront his offender. He had been given the courage to let go. He had been given the courage to ask for forgiveness. My job was to accept it and to allow him to move on.
My job was to handle what God had given me… a clean slate in someone’s mind. A clean slate where there had been a dark smudge.
Don’t wait! Before receiving, GIVE! Give the gift to yourself… the gift of letting go.
“I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.”
Thanks for following JanBeek and for coming to read and leave a comment today. You matter. I write for you. God bless you! See ya tomorrow.
My second grandson was the screamer. He spent the first couple years of his life doing it. He certainly knew how to let his emotions out!
Screaming may not be the best way as an adult To emote your emotions! What are some healthy ways to let these feelings out?
But some fear is real and intended It’s good to embrace fear when a bear is growling at you It’s good to fear a runaway truck or an avalanche Know when to embrace fear!
Screaming in anger at a situation you can’t control may not be the best way to embrace your emotion But anger in itself is not wrong Jesus overturned the tables of the money changers Embrace righteous anger!
In Daily Guideposts today, Erika Bentson wrote,
“Cowgirls don’t cry!” She admitted that she is “not the type to carry tissues” but instead she can “brush over ]her] feelings.” “Mourning doesn’t come easily to me,” is how she began. Even in the face of her father’s death, she “stayed strong – mostly.”
In the end of the article, Erika quoted a friend who told her, “Tears are a testament to what a great dad he was.” She encouraged her to let the emotions show. “Don’t be ashamed that you’re human,” she told her.
Embrace your sadness! Allow your grief to play out!
“I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.”
Embrace your tears! Let them flow.
Speaking of “Don’t be ashamed that you’re human,” what about it? Does shame have a place in our emotional outlet?
“O Lord, let me not be put to shame, for I call upon You; let the wicked be put to shame; let them go silently to Sheol.”
Where does that emotion of shame fit in? When we have screwed up and we know it, When we have said something without thinking, When we have done something to hurt someone else, It is the shame we feel that causes remorse. It is the remorse that leads to repentance. It is the repentance that leads to “calling out” And it is calling out that leads to forgiveness. Do not wallow in shame. Face your actions, face your emotions, and clear your conscience.
Confront your shame and eliminate it!
Do not despair! Replace despair with hope. Despair is not a healthy emotion. We are humans, prone to error, But we are not desperate!
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
This is one of my favorite verses. It is my faith that keeps me from despair- And my prayer for you is that regardless of your circumstance, you also can have the faith “which surpasses all understanding.”
Do not embrace despair!
I feared that my second grandson, the Screamer, would grow up to be a very disgruntled human being. I should never have let that emotion embrace me. Embrace the peacefulness of hope! Embrace the peacefulness of letting go. Embrace the peacefulness of knowing God’s got this!!
The emotions that accompany peacefulness are joy, contentment, satisfaction, and submission.
What about that emotion of pride? Pride in self? Pride in your accomplishments – Pride in the person your children or grandchildren have become – What about pride?
“Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight.”
Bob is reading a book right now titled, Soul Survivor, by Philip Yancey. In it he learned about thirteen people who influenced Yancey’s life. One of them is Gandhi who always traveled third class. When asked why, his response was, “Because there is no fourth class.”
In the last years of his life, Gandhi adopted a man with leprosy. Daily he bathed him and changed that man’s bandaged.
“The reward for humility and fear of the Lord is riches and honor and life.”
Gandhi was invited to meet the King of England. Gandhi approached the king wearing only his loincloth. A bystander asked him why he was dressed so scantily. He responded, “He is wearing enough clothes for both of us,”
Gandhi embraced the emotion of humility to the extreme. As a result, he was indeed rewarded with “honor and life,” but his riches were not in gold and silver, for he disdained material possessions, his riches were in honor, peace, and a meaningful life.
When you go to Google and enter Gandhi’s name, Mahatma Gandhi – Wikipedia, it will tell you: “Mahatma Gandhi, as he is known by his followers with reverence, preached the philosophy of non-violence which has become even more relevant today. His commitment to non-violence and satyagraha (peaceful resistance) gave hope to marginalized sections of India.”
Humility is a Wonderful Emotional Outlet!
Embrace the emotions associated with humility: joy compassion contentment satisfaction and leave all your worries behind!
Tell Me: Which emotion will you embrace more today? And which will you try to release?
“As for these four youths, God gave them learning and skill in all literature and wisdom, and Daniel had understanding in all visions and dreams.”
Wisdom is not relegated to the aged. Daniel was a boy of 17 when he was chosen. You are chosen today to tap into The wisdom God has for you!
“Walk with the wise and become wise.”
God gives us true friends Who are wise and wonderful. They are His gifts to us To help us EMBRACE WISDOM
He has chosen friends for us Who are wise and full of grace. They walk into our hearts And leave their footprints all over it!
In today’s Daily Guideposts, Ginger Rue wrote, “…you become like the five people you spend the most time with.” She told a story about how her husband, “Sweet Dwight,” is a person she wishes to emulate. “I hope someday to have a heart like my husband’s: wise, and full of grace… and always looking for the best in people.”
Who is a star in your life, an example of wisdom and grace? Are the five people you spend the most time with people whose lives you wish to emulate? Can you name them?
I have told my WP friends this story before, but it was a while back… and since then, many of you are new to JanBeek, so it bears repeating:
My friend, Bob Jorgenson, born with Cerebral Palsy, was bright as a tack. His parents brought him every Sunday to church in his wheel chair. They sat mid-way up in the sanctuary with him. They stayed after church for fellowship. They helped people understand what Bob had to say – because Bob’s speech was compromised – but he had so much to say!
Homer and Ruth knew their son would not live a long life, but they packed ten life-times into Bob’s 35 years. They took him to Europe, to Disneyland, to Asia, to the Holy Land. They built a train track and a miniature train in a circle around their wooded property, and fixed up the engine so that Bob could run the train and give train rides to various groups of kids who came to experience the wonder of it.
When Bob was on his last breaths, lying helpless and speechless in his hospital bed, Homer sat with him. He had Bob’s favorite hymnal. As he turned the pages, Homer asked Bob to blink when he came to a song Bob wanted to hear.
Homer was singing “It is Well With My Soul” to his son when Bob breathed his last.
I never hear this song without welling up inside. My heart smiles.