Loving One Another

Posts tagged ‘Listening’

Everyone Needs Help Sometimes


This is the end of National Suicide Prevention Week,
But it is not the end of our need to reach out and help.

Everyone needs a little help sometimes –
And some of us need more help more often than others.

So print this chart of help providers
And have it ready to give to a friend in need.

We are told that the best help we can give
Is just to be there, to care, to listen.

No one should be left to feel unloved, unnecessary,
Unwanted, unappreciated. Every life matters!

You matter. I matter.
Don’t doubt it for a moment!

See ya later.

How Do We Stay Together?


Happy 19th Anniversary to Ed & Maria!

Ed & Maria Platt

Happy 55th Anniversary to Bruce & Ann

Bruce & Ann Beekman

Happy 57th Anniversary, Bonnie & Stan

Bonnie (Beekman) & Stan Hunt

Happy 60th Anniversary, Marge & Bill !!

Bill & Marge Beekman

And Happy 57th Anniversary (58 in February) to Bob & me
– as we enjoy this 80th year of our lives
– and celebrate our togetherness
– and thank God for our health

Jan & Bob – How’d ya do it?

How do couple stay together so long?

That’s a question Bill & Marge were asked at our granddaughter, Faith’s wedding when the 4 Beekman couples were the last ones left on the dance floor after the disk jockey (DJ) said, “All couples married less than 55 years sit down.”

Wow! Here we were… eight old farts still standing, still dancing, still together.

Marge Beekman’s answer was, “Never go to bed mad at each other.”

Bill Beekman was asked for his answer. He said, “I agree with Marge.

The DJ said, “Did you see that? Did you hear that? He let her answer first and then he just agreed with her. There’s the secret to a long married life!”

Are There Other Secrets?

Well, if he had asked me, “How have you stayed together for 57 years?” I would have answered with not just one, but TEN ideas! (He would have had to cut me off!)

These ideas have worked for us in our long marriage – and have contributed to my ability to tell you, “We’re not just still together, but I love him more today than I did the day we married.”

What Are the Tips for Longevity in Relationships?

  1. Pray together – make the Lord central in your relationship – ask Him to guide your days and help you with every decision. Listen for His Holy Spirit to speak to you and help you as you walk daily in His Will to the best of your abilities.
  2. Give each other space – you are a couple, but you are also people with your own ideas, your own needs, and your own agendas. Allow each other the right to make individual decisions and keep your own identities bright and alive. We even have separate checking accounts. As long as the household needs are met, I don’t have to account to him for every penny of my retirement money that I spend… and likewise, his retirement play money is his to play with as he chooses. Give each other individual freedoms!!
  3. Listen to one another – really hear! Care about what the other thinks and find out why he/she really believes that. Never stop learning from one another.
  4. Go to church together – find a worship community and cultivate their friendships. We are Christians – and we want you to be able to see that in our love for one another and our love for YOU. “They will know we are Christians by our love ❤ ” is not just a song we love to sing, but a life we strive to live. Our Christian friends are our support system, our help in time of need, our prayer partners. There is no friend like the long-term friends you make under the cross of Jesus!
  5. Play together – you may each have your own idea of what “fun” is (He fishes, I don’t. I love movies & popcorn, he doesn’t. He skis, I don’t. I go to Writer’s Group each Friday, he doesn’t. He loves yard work … or at least does it masterfully, I don’t. I love to volunteer at the Sr. Center, the Medical Center, help seniors in need, he doesn’t.) You get the idea. But we love to go riding on the Montana mountain trails with friends in our ATV – and we love entertaining friends in our home, hosting over-nighters for a week or a month or even a year in our home. We love going out to Dave’s Sushi or enjoying a BBQed dinner with fine wine at home. The idea is, find your areas of commonality and play happily together!
  6. Treasure and Appreciate One Another – Bob’s nickname for me (he has many, but my favorite ) is “Precious.” I appreciate his expressions of love and affection and his readiness to show appreciation. He often comments on things like, “My, you look pretty today!” or “I like the way you added that spice to the ______ (fill in the blank) for dinner tonight.” In return I try not to take for granted his beautiful yard work or the delicious waffles he makes for breakfast or his warm and plentiful hugs. Thank you is such an important word in any relationship!
  7. Love One Another even when you don’t Like each other! None of us is perfect. We often do things to “piss each other off!” It could be something as simple as leaving the toilet seat up or not putting the lid back on the toothpaste. Or it could be a major thing like staying out late without saying you were going to do so – and not calling to say where you are. Showing LOVE for one another is treating your partner the way you want to be treated and expressing yourself clearly without anger (if possible) when your expectations are not met. Loving is compromising and not always expecting things to go your way. Love is forgiving and trying NOT to be the annoying one in the relationship!
  8. Be Kind and Compassionate – Yes, we all make mistakes. We do stupid things. We say things we wish we could take back. When we are at our worst, that’s when we need kindness most. It’s when our partner is at his/her worst that we find it most difficult to be kind in return. But harshness begets hatred and ugliness begets violence. Our response is crucial. Of course, there are caustic relationships that are unhealthy and are not meant to be sustained. No one is called to be a doormat. My heart goes out to those who are in relationships with those who inflict mental or physical abuse. Especially when help is offered, but refused. Sometimes leaving is the most loving option. Kindness/Compassion is a two-way street!
  9. Trust! – Without mutual trust, the relationship is doomed! My husband, Bob’s ski buddy is Nancy. She is a 50-something dynamo who is a ball of energy and fun. She’s a fantastic skier and loves to do those double diamond runs – just like Bob does. If I didn’t trust Bob, I could be jealous of the time they spend together on the slopes and I could conjure up all sorts of images of what I think might or might not be happening. But, Bob & I always have lived with mutual trust – and so instead of worrying, I treasure Nancy’s friendship, too. I love getting together whenever we can with her and her fun-loving husband, Dan. In fact, she’s the one I told you about a few days ago when I said I wanted to adopt a Daughter #4. You gotta trust – and in that confidence enjoy a multitude of friendships and a plethora of opportunities you might miss otherwise!
  10. Respect! – It’s the bottom line. Without mutual respect, you may as well call it a day NOW. I have been around couples where one of them is so disrespectful to his/her partner that it smells up the room. The air is so caustic, you don’t want to be within ten miles of ’em. You want to shake ’em and wake ’em up to what they are doing to one another – or what one is doing to the other. But, rarely does intervention help. You sigh, shake your head, and vow not to ever do that to YOUR loved one. That’s a vow worth keeping if your relationship is worth having! ALWAYS show respect to your partner… and while you’re at it, respect yourself. God don’t make no junk … you’re a treasure!

God Bless You

I love you

See ya tomorrow

Finding Understanding


Finding Understanding

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Have you found The One
Who understands your thinking?
You are surely blessed!

Finding understanding
Is a gift beyond compare.
If you’ve such a friendship,
Guard it lovingly with care.

It’s taken half a decade
For my spouse and me to see
Eye to eye and to hear correctly
What the other expresses silently.

I’ve a life-long girlfriend who
Understands my silent sighs.
Ours is a priceless friendship.
No need to hide or disguise.

I hope you’ve had the pleasure
Of a relationship like mine.
Such understanding is a treasure
Greater than gold. It’s so fine!

It takes practice to be a hearer
Who catches the whispers in the air.
But, if you really love someone,
You can do it. Just listen… feel…  care!

heart of love
See you tomorrow

Unbearable Sermon Message


Unbearable

Some Sundays, the sermon message is unbearable! But, I go, I listen, and I try to discern what God is trying t tell me. I let the minister speak to my heart and I ask God to help me be discerning.

Today was one of those days when I longed for a pastor who could divert her attention from the lectionary cycle and get with the stuff that is more “cultural.” After all, it’s Father’s Day! I don’t want to hear about the unbearable!

adult alone anxious black and white

Photo by Kat Jayne on Pexels.com

But, based on John 16: 12-15, somehow Rev. Jean Johnson at our Madison Valley Presbyterian church came us with this unlkely message for today:

Unbearable

Jesus did not tell His disciples
All that He had to say.
He said some things were unbearable.
They’d hear them another day.
.
Preparing for vacation, a family
Was told to come right away.
There had been an accident –
Too unbearable to hear any day!
.
Their son had not survived.
They were devastated, of course.
How can we respond or help?
We can’t fathom their remorse.
.
Think of a time when indeed,
Delight and splendor were spilled overboard.
Ever had so much happiness
You could only say, “Thank You, Lord”?
.
The touch of your spouse’s love
Can be beautifully unbearable
When you know forgiveness
Was given for the unshareable.
.
Things can be unbearably wonderful,
Or they can be unbearably awful.
Unbearable opens our hearts to love.
The opposite, unfeeling, should be unlawful!
.
When you bear the unbearable,
God is with you, alive and well.
In tears of joy or cries of agony,
God’s more present than we can tell.
.
When life is too big, too real,
Too much – too much to bear,
That’s when we know God for sure,
When the Spirit declares, “I Am There.”
.
Nothing is withheld from God.
We may feel a flutter like a dove…
It’s God, who is lifting us up.
When in the unbearable, we feel His love.
.
Thank You, God!
You never fail me!

Amen?
Amen!

I pray you had an UNBEARABLY joyful
Father’s Day today!
heart of love
See ya tomorrow.

7 Steps to Happiness


7 Steps to Happiness.jpg

Happiness is easier to CREATE than it is to FIND.

CREATE it!

Just
Love One Another

photo of couple sitting on hammock

Photo by Artem Beliaikin @belart84 on Pexels.com

Love and Appreciate

It’s never too late

Listen and Learn

Find that for which you yearn

Accept and Smile

And go the extra mile

Feel and Do

Do what God has given you

Love and Appreciate

It’s never too late!

red rose

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Here’s a red rose of love for you.
Thanks for visiting JanBeek.
Tell me something or someone you
are loving right now!

I am loving YOU!!
Have a great week.

pexels-photo-887349
See ya tomorrow.

Love, Light, Listening, Laughter


Welcome to Day #12,
the “L” Day
on the A-Z series,

Add Greater Meaning
and
Purpose to

Life

Ya Gotta Love Life

silhouette of people jumping

Photo by vjapratama on Pexels.com


Life is Light
and
Light is Life

pexels-photo-301599

Without Light, we’d all die

grayscale photography of human skull

Photo by ahmed adly on Pexels.com


Laughter adds Light to Life
It makes Life Lighter
Ya Gotta Listen for and Join the Laughter

IMG_5732

Need a little laughter today?
This one cracked me up!!

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I shared this one with my husband and got a chuckle outta him.
This could be my niece’s husband, Bill’s head:

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Maybe you’ll laugh out loud at this one:

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58717917_1234925809998543_6894752287789416448_n

Yes,
without Laughter, we might

be at a dead end!!

Love Life; Be the Light
Sparkle with Light and Laughter
Color my Purpose!

pexels-photo-977539.jpeg

Photo by Godisable Jacob on Pexels.com

People who sparkle with color that lights the path to my purpose are like angels.

Dr Jimmy Walters, a fellow blogger whom I admire and follow,
wrote about Michaelangelo yesterday in his blog.
He told in his article titled, Set Free Your Inner Angel,
how Michelangelo, the famous Renaissance artist,
approached sculpting as a process to “set free” angels.
Dr. Walters said, “He would pick the right block of rigid stone,
and through a discovery process,
chip away until he set the angel,
or statue, free.”
He went on to say,
“You are called to be the hero of your own life,
and as a result, a hero for others.
The road to the light begins with your dreams,
and accepting them as a mandate.
At times, these dreams are finally welcomed by you
because of a crack to your armor.
At other times, dreams are pursued
because you are finally ready to be your true self.”

angel-bee friends

My friend, Art, who is in our Madison Valley Writers’ Group,
shared a beautiful essay on the subject of LIGHT today.
In my estimation, he is a man
who has pursued his dreams and has set his true self free.
As I listened to Art, one sentence that brought
a beautiful image to mind was:
“I write with the fervor of a bee born to die.”

I write with that fervor, too. Do you?

purple flowers in bloom

My husband, Bob, is a retired beekeeper.
Today he is helping to install bees in a new observation hive
at our school here in Ennis, Montana.
He continues to find purpose in life by
teaching people of all ages
about the life of  honeybees.
Like all of us, bees are born to die.

Honeybees sting to protect themselves,
their queen or their hives.
Drones (male bees) have no stinger.
But, the female worker bees, do, of course!
If she stings you,
she dies.

Living to love, listening for/sharing laughter,
and learning to “Bee the Light,”
gives my life purpose.
What are you willing to die for?


Listen
for the ideas you love,
and let them add meaning to your life.

Will you share one of those ideas with me?

 

Celebrate Palm Sunday


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Celebrate Palm Sunday with branches

Like the ones His disciples laid

Across His path in Jerusalem –

A path on which our sinful debts were paid.

.

Let each branch represent

A deed you’d like to see undone.

Give all regrets to Jesus, and

Lay those sins upon God’s Son.

.

He knew as He was riding in

Upon a humble donkey’s back

That He was headed to fulfill

His earthly purpose – that’s a fact.

.

With that triumphant entrance,

He willingly trudged Golgotha’s Hill.

Today Holy Week is beginning.

Receive its message. Heed and listen.
… Heart, be still.

I listened to the sermon in church this morning,
and as usual, I took notes in poetry.
Here is what I “took away”
from Rev. Jean Johnson’s message:

 

cross-sunset-sunrise-hill-70847.jpeg

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

 

“Commitment”
– reflections on Luke 22-23

Pageantry and wildly waving palm branches
Are not the acts that really matter.
Palm Sunday is about the difference
Between Christ’s commitment and our chatter.

People were involved as Christ entered
The city of Jerusalem to die;
But their focus soon returned home.
They forgot Jesus, abandoned Him without a cry.

Commitment is a hard road to tred.
It requires we stay when we’re through.
Stay beyond the time we think we’re done.
Tenacity’s hard for me and you.

Sometimes when we feel abandoned,
The emptiness of our heart makes room
For the One who never left us.
He is there through our joy and in our gloom.

Christ gave His all on Golgotha Hill.
He died for us, for our salvation.
We need to walk that path with Him;
Live the pain, know the cost, delay elation.

Our faith voyage leads through Jerusalem.
We must walk the way of the cross.
Walk in commitment to Calgary,
Suffer the insults, and know the loss.

Amen?

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