My second grandson was the screamer. He spent the first couple years of his life doing it. He certainly knew how to let his emotions out!
Screaming may not be the best way as an adult To emote your emotions! What are some healthy ways to let these feelings out?
But some fear is real and intended It’s good to embrace fear when a bear is growling at you It’s good to fear a runaway truck or an avalanche Know when to embrace fear!
Screaming in anger at a situation you can’t control may not be the best way to embrace your emotion But anger in itself is not wrong Jesus overturned the tables of the money changers Embrace righteous anger!
In Daily Guideposts today, Erika Bentson wrote,
“Cowgirls don’t cry!” She admitted that she is “not the type to carry tissues” but instead she can “brush over ]her] feelings.” “Mourning doesn’t come easily to me,” is how she began. Even in the face of her father’s death, she “stayed strong – mostly.”
In the end of the article, Erika quoted a friend who told her, “Tears are a testament to what a great dad he was.” She encouraged her to let the emotions show. “Don’t be ashamed that you’re human,” she told her.
Embrace your sadness! Allow your grief to play out!
“I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.”
Embrace your tears! Let them flow.
Speaking of “Don’t be ashamed that you’re human,” what about it? Does shame have a place in our emotional outlet?
“O Lord, let me not be put to shame, for I call upon You; let the wicked be put to shame; let them go silently to Sheol.”
Where does that emotion of shame fit in? When we have screwed up and we know it, When we have said something without thinking, When we have done something to hurt someone else, It is the shame we feel that causes remorse. It is the remorse that leads to repentance. It is the repentance that leads to “calling out” And it is calling out that leads to forgiveness. Do not wallow in shame. Face your actions, face your emotions, and clear your conscience.
Confront your shame and eliminate it!
Do not despair! Replace despair with hope. Despair is not a healthy emotion. We are humans, prone to error, But we are not desperate!
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
This is one of my favorite verses. It is my faith that keeps me from despair- And my prayer for you is that regardless of your circumstance, you also can have the faith “which surpasses all understanding.”
Do not embrace despair!
I feared that my second grandson, the Screamer, would grow up to be a very disgruntled human being. I should never have let that emotion embrace me. Embrace the peacefulness of hope! Embrace the peacefulness of letting go. Embrace the peacefulness of knowing God’s got this!!
The emotions that accompany peacefulness are joy, contentment, satisfaction, and submission.
What about that emotion of pride? Pride in self? Pride in your accomplishments – Pride in the person your children or grandchildren have become – What about pride?
“Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight.”
Bob is reading a book right now titled, Soul Survivor, by Philip Yancey. In it he learned about thirteen people who influenced Yancey’s life. One of them is Gandhi who always traveled third class. When asked why, his response was, “Because there is no fourth class.”
In the last years of his life, Gandhi adopted a man with leprosy. Daily he bathed him and changed that man’s bandaged.
“The reward for humility and fear of the Lord is riches and honor and life.”
Gandhi was invited to meet the King of England. Gandhi approached the king wearing only his loincloth. A bystander asked him why he was dressed so scantily. He responded, “He is wearing enough clothes for both of us,”
Gandhi embraced the emotion of humility to the extreme. As a result, he was indeed rewarded with “honor and life,” but his riches were not in gold and silver, for he disdained material possessions, his riches were in honor, peace, and a meaningful life.
When you go to Google and enter Gandhi’s name, Mahatma Gandhi – Wikipedia, it will tell you: “Mahatma Gandhi, as he is known by his followers with reverence, preached the philosophy of non-violence which has become even more relevant today. His commitment to non-violence and satyagraha (peaceful resistance) gave hope to marginalized sections of India.”
Humility is a Wonderful Emotional Outlet!
Embrace the emotions associated with humility: joy compassion contentment satisfaction and leave all your worries behind!
Tell Me: Which emotion will you embrace more today? And which will you try to release?
Embrace Questioning! Do we embrace all questions? Like, “Are you stupid?”
No, it’s not questions, But the act of questioning That deserves embrace.
Not all questions are Developed with pure motives. Embrace those that are!
Embrace a pure heart Full of inquisitiveness. Ask because you care.
When you meet someone Ask their name and remember – Use it lovingly.
Ask about their life. Listen with sincere interest. Listening’s a gift.
Questioning’s one thing; Listening is another. They go hand in hand.
When I think of questioning with a pure motive and listening with an open heart, I think of Job. Even if you are not a Christian, seeped in the Bible stories, you have heard the expression, “The patience of Job.” (That’s pronounced Jobe… not job, like Steve Jobs, the American business magnate). What made the prophet, Job, come to mind?
Job is presented in the Bible as a good and prosperous family man who is beset by Satan with God‘s permission with horrendous disasters that take away all that he holds dear, including his children, his health, and his property. He struggles to understand his situation and begins a search for the answers to his difficulties. Searching for answers involves questioning. He does so without condemning God. He maintains his trust in God to ultimately work for his good – even when he is in the worst of his turmoil.
What a desolate looking man! What must he be saying to God? What questions would you be asking?
What does Job ask God? “He demands answers from God Himself. Job wants to know why bad things happen to good people. He knows it’s not right, and will not accept the saccharine answers of his friends.”
God, “Why Have You Made Me Your Target”? (Job 7:20)
God explains to Job that to us mere mortals sometimes there are no words—no rationalizations—that can make sense of the unhappiness we endure.
Trauma happens and we have to accept it. Explanations may make us feel better, but they mislead. Ultimately, Job, like all of us, must endure suffering not knowing why … or if the question even counts.
Once Job accepts this, he somehow manages to live with his trauma without becoming its victim.
The Book of Job asks “why good people suffer,” but never actually answers the question. What it does do, is correct misconceptions about why we suffer. The truth of this wonderful tale is that man can’t know everything.
Again, let me repeat, “Once Job accepts this, he somehow manages to live with his trauma without becoming its victim.”
How does this story relate to your life and mine? Have you ever questioned why life was throwing stones at you that you didn’t deserve?
Or have you questioned why you didn’t get a job that you knew you deserved?
This happened recently to my son. He applied for a job that he knew he was qualified for. Another person was chosen instead. He got a form letter of rejection. Instead of falling into a fit of depression or raging in disbelief, he called the person who did get the job and congratulated her. He asked if there was anything he could do to support her in her assignment – and he asked her to keep an eye out in case she saw a position in the future for which she thought he might be a good fit.
Within a day, he received a call back and an extension of his responsibilities was offered along with a significant pay raise.
Now, I’m not suggesting that every time you ask the right questions with the right motive, you’ll get a pay raise!
No, it’s not that simple. But, what embracing questioning does is it changes your focus. The right questions – in the right spirit – make the difference between misery and openness. The difference between depression and expression. The difference between pessimism and positivity.
Embrace a pure heart Full of inquisitiveness. Ask because you care.
Don’t question, “Why you?” Instead ask, “What can I do?” “Can I be of any help?”
Your attitude counts. Humility is the key. Embrace questioning!
God is good. All the time! Even to the Jobs of this world! Be patient in love. Your pay raise is coming!!
Thanks for visiting JanBeek Got any questions?? See ya tomorrow.
As a teacher of elementary children for nearly a quarter of a century and the mom of two very curious children, I can tell you that one of the most annoying questions is “Why?”
I remember the day I finally asked my father, “Why not?” when he told me NO. I was about 20 years old! Can you imagine? Being raised in a family where when Dad said, “No,” that was final? No questions asked. Just obey?
My kids were not like that. It was a different era. They asked, “Why?” before they knew how to say, “Chocolate!”
I think a measure of a child’s intelligence may be how many times s/he asks “Why?” The explorations, poking, questioning, prodding, relentless inquisitive nature of some children and adults can be downright annoying, though.
The path may not be a straight one… And it may be hard to determine where it leads, but curiosity will keep you (and them) moving forward. There is a huge NEED to know what’s beyond the bend!
As parents and teachers we sometimes want to shield our children from the unknown. There may be danger out there. I had a tendency to be protective. I know that’s where my dad was coming from when he said, “No!”
But squelching curiosity because of fear of the unknown is a dangerous path. It can lead to many missed opportunities and lost happiness.
Instead of being annoyed by the “Why?” and the “Why not?” we need to teach ourselves and our children the importance of always questioning.
Accepting “No” for an answer without questioning can lead to stagnation.
Instead of squelching curiosity, let’s turn our questioning into research with a purpose.
Curious people don’t just look Curious people see Curious people don’t just see Curious people question Curious people don’t just question Curious people probe
With a thirst for answers, Curious people are relentless. They keep asking until They find answers that satisfy.
Curiosity changes our perceptions. It changes our way of seeing things. It helps us gain the wisdom That less curious people Spend a life-time chasing.
Francoise Sagan is credited with that quote. Who was he? Are you curious? I was.
“Françoise Sagan (born Françoise Delphine Quoirez; 21 June 1935 – 24 September 2004) was a French playwright, novelist, and screenwriter. Sagan was known for works with strong romantic themes involving wealthy and disillusioned bourgeois characters. Her best-known novel was her first – Bonjour Tristesse (1954) – which was written when she was a teenager.
Want to know more? Put her name in your Google search engine. We are so blessed to have an encyclopedia at our fingertips. Folks with insatiable appetites for answers can ask the who, what, why, when, and how questions and Siri or Alexa or Wikipedia are right there. What a gift these are to the curious.
EMBRACE CURIOSITY! Let your “Why?” be followed by active listening, thoughtful reading, and the explorations, poking, questioning, prodding, trying again, inquisitive nature that those children and adults exhibited who were downright annoying. Go ahead! Be annoying!
Thanks for visiting JanBeek today.
I’m curious. What are you up to? What are you curious about?
Every first and third Friday our Madison County Writers’ Group meets in Ennis, Montana. We may have just two participants, or we could have eight or ten. Last February during our third Friday meeting, there were just two of us. I recently came across my notes from that meeting.
We begin our meeting each time with a prompt we draw from a bag. Anyone can add prompts to the bag at any time. On this particular Friday, Steve drew the prompt, “Writer’s Block.” We had ten or fifteen minutes to write on that prompt and then share with one another what we had written.
I decided to write a Haiku. It ended up as a 5 stanza poem… each stanza a syllabic count of 5-7-5 syllables. What would you have written with the prompt “Writer’s Block”?
Let me share mine with you.
Writer’s Block can trap You and me in wordless haze Floating in nothing
Nothingness can hold You and me in dilemma Pen in hand stands still
Stillness can reveal Treasures in the quietness You just can’t force it
Forcefulness is great If you adamantly feel Thoughts begin to swirl
Swirling thoughts spin out With contemplation and ease The Block disappears
We had so much fun sharing our ideas on Writer’s Block that we decided to draw another prompt. This one was “Words.” We gave ourselves another ten minutes.
This time since I was on a roll with the Haiku rhythm, I wrote a 3 stanza poem. Sharing it later with my husband, Bob, he asked, “What determines if your Haiku is going to be one stanza or 3 or 5?”
“You write what you have to say,” I told him. “When you have said it, you stop. The thoughts dictate the length.”
Here’s what I wrote to the prompt, WORDS:
When words just fail me, I sit back and dream awhile. Dreams don’t have to speak.
When dreams are wordless, My imagination spins – Motivating scenes.
Let pictures emerge. Print them on your mind and soul. Eventually: WORDS!
These kinds of dreams come to us as writers, but they come to painters and potters and musicians as well. It’s a capacity of the human brain that needs to be cultivated.
A productive life is one that can get beyond writers block, can use words to express inner feelings, and can listen with heart to the unspoken words of those around them.
I hope you are a proponent of the kind of arts education that promotes such critical thinking. Let your curious mind fly free.
Be a wise consumer of words and thoughts and dreams! Do you have a Writers’ Group? If so, tell me about it. If not, think about forming one. It’s such fun to share your creative thoughts with others face to face, not just on WordPress.