Spreading love, joy, peace, faith & unity

Embrace Respect

At the doctor’s office this week,
the physician asked us how long we’d been married.
As a couple in our 80’s, that’s a question we hear
Often in these days of hurry and scurry from the harried.

When we say it’ll be 60 years next February,
they say, “Congratulations, Wow!” and then they ask,
“What’s the secret to such a long relationship?”
They can see our smiles through our masks.

“Mutual respect,” I say. “And Faith,” Bob adds.
“We pray together daily because we believe
those who pray together stay together.”
The doc asks, “Do you have other tips up your sleeve?”

“Of course,” Bob responds with a twinkle,
“Never stop showing how much you care!”
And I reinforced the idea, “Mutual respect is a must.
Add the element of trust – and be willing to openly share.”

“At the same time,” I must add, “Remember this:
We are individuals who need to be allowed space.
We’re not connected at the hip, and we can go
our separate ways while sharing this place.”

Respecting one another means we value
the uniqueness each of us brings
to our marriage relationship – and its OK
for one of us to fiddle while the other one sings.

It’s OK for me to be in the bell choir and blog
while Bob watches Monday Night football.
It’s OK for him to prefer history or sports
while I read a novel or make a phone call.

It’s OK for Bob to sit for a while and read
while I clean off the table after dinner.
But when it comes time to do the dishes,
Get up and help if you wanna win her!

It’s Ok to divide some of the chores.
I don’t wanna learn to mow the lawn!
And Bob can’t turn on the washing machine;
but share some tasks – don’t be withdrawn!

Does that mean we always agree?
That we never argue with each other?
No, not at all… we’re human after all!
But we don’t fight with one another!

You can disagree with mutual respect.
The key to that statement is to listen.
Honor your partner’s right to an opinion –
and enjoy equality – not one forcing dominion.

What’s the secret to a long, happy relationship?
Mutual respect, shared faith, and trust –
equal rights, space, avoiding fights,
and time apart every now & then – if you must!

Bob enjoys fishing… I don’t!

I enjoy volunteering at the Food Bank or Nursing Home –
that’s not in Bob’s sweet spot!

We both enjoy a nice glass of wine
with a tasty meal – and occasionally eating out.
It’s important to find some common ground
otherwise you’ll smile less and increase your pout!

So, my friends, what’s the bottom line?
God helped us find each other from the start –
And through the years we’ve leaned on Him for help.
We thank the Lord for His loving heart!

Gratitude can’t be left our of the equation.
Don’t forget to thank Jesus and remember to say
“Thank you” to one another every day.
Thank Heaven, our love is here to stay!

Do you think I should learn to fish?

What are your secrets to a long and happy marriage?
I wish you a life-time of mutual love and respect.

See ya tomorrow (God willing)

Comments on: "Embrace Respect" (26)

  1. Beautiful post!! Love, love it! Love you too!! 🙏🏻💜🛐🌻

  2. DeDe Sunshine said:

    What a beautiful poem, momma! I love it! And I love YOU!

  3. Wow 🤩 so happy for you both.

  4. You are certainly showing the way. X Just thank Bob for all the fish

  5. Reading your post filled me with so much of happiness, love, and respect for the two of you. I’m still only 24, but I pray I have something just as beautiful and precious as your marriage in store for me.

    Hope Sir Bob is keeping well. And so are you, dear Lady Jan.

    The photos look fab! Take care!

    • Oh, dear Kanika, I pray for your future to hold a precious, long-lasting and faith-filled love, too. Thank you, dear one, for your delightful response. God bless you!

  6. Jan, the final photo says so much. A lasting marriage challenges us to sometimes step out of our comfort zone (just once with a fishing pole in hand). The treasure of love between you and Bob reminds me of my maternal grandparents. High school sweethearts who understood the true meaning of love and respect.

    • Thank you, {{{Richard}}} – I love it when our story reminds people of their parents or grandparents’ relationships. It’s so special to have that faithful model in your extended family. Bob & I have it on both sides of our family.

  7. Jan, you and Bob are shining examples of why true love can last–it has to have God at the center! You remind me of my parents! Love and peace to you both!

  8. Jan, Steve and I will celebrate 59 years, also in February (Ground Hog day), and we both agreed you explained the success of your 60 years beautifully. When I’ve been asked the same question I frequently say in any marriage or relationship there are peaks and valleys you travel through and with faith, love and forgiveness you weather the storms and come out on top. We are Blessed to have a loving family and many long time friends also in their 80’s.
    God Bless you and Bob and may you enjoy good health and many more years together- Happy Anniversary come February.
    Judy & Steve

    • How fun to get your delightful response, Judy 🥰👌🏽 I am so glad to hear about your similar marriage journey and your addition of forgiveness to the qualities necessary for a successful long-term relationship. Ah yes, a necessary ingredient, indeed! Happy Ground Hog’s Day! Happy Anniversary! May the Son☀️ shine in your hearts daily!

  9. Hi Jan,
    I love this! Your tips are perfect!
    Blessings and many, many more years! ♥♥

    • Thank you so much. I try to remember those tips and apply them myself on those days when life gets frustrating! (That does happen, you know!) <3

  10. Oh wow… what a beautiful poem and So filled with love… And Congratulations for the coming February Jan… And many more….. Love and Blessings .. Keep smiling that beautiful smile..

  11. A wonderful post Jan. So many great words of wisdom and advice for a long-lasting relationship!

  12. Truly a beautiful post! I think you covered it. As for fishing, I say, leave it to Bob.

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