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Embrace Stories

More on the saga of my bruised face!

A friend texted me and suggested,

“The fun part of getting
not one,
but
two black eyes,
is making up some wild,
harebrained event that caused them.

Sky diving accident?

Or when they turn yellow…
trying out for a clown part
in an adaptation of a Stephen King novel.”

I think I could pull off a clown part
in a Stephen King adaptation, don’t you?

I don’t need to wait til they turn yellow…
just match the magenta with my lipstick,
clothing, and earrings,
and (as Derrick suggested)
EMBRACE THE BRUISES!!

It’s getting better – don’t you think?

If you’re just tuning in to this messed up face saga,
I need you to know that I got into a wrestling match
with a tiger – and I won. The tiger
ran off into the woods, never to attack a human again!

And if you believe that, you need to buy my latest novel…
published by Porterhouse … available on your next steak.

If you can’t embrace sunglasses
and hide the damage,
then ya gotta smile and bare it,
right?

And while we’re at it, I have another story to tell you:

You know I’d not be likely to buy a case of beer –
but good wine, now that’s another story!

Now if you think I have any flawless dance moves left in me,
I have a glass of Kool-Aid to sell you.
I have waaaay too many birthday stories to tell –
and a whole lot of receipts for the Kool-Aid I’ve sold.

… especially the body parts around my knees and ankles!
I’ve had my right knee replaced.
How about you,
you got any artificial parts
so they make you go through
the metal scanner at the airport?
Bob & I both get the fun of being frisked
every time we take a trip!

But, we’ve decided flying is a better way to go
instead of driving these days.
Driving requires sitting next to one another
and trying to talk to each other.
After nearly 60 years of marriage,
what’s left to talk about?
On a plane, if you’re lucky,
you get the center aisle –
and somebody new to talk to.

Seeing better was a perk of younger years.
Hearing better is a perk of aging…
but it takes a set of $4000 aids to do it.

As the birthdays pile up,
we have to be sure we have our bifocals
and our hearing aids
before we leave home.

Next it’ll be our walking stick
or a walker!!

Try not to lose your glasses
or your car keys –
That’s one of the problems
we multi-birthday folks have.
But that’s not as bad a losing
your memory.

Did I tell you the story about
how I got these black eyes?
Oh, I did?

It was back on the blog called
EMBRACE HARD HEADS –


Remember?

You don’t?


Oh well…
That’s a story for another day.

Do you have a story to tell?
Come on, be a sport…
Entertain me!

See ya tomorrow (God willing)
Love,
JanBeek

Comments on: "Embrace Stories" (8)

  1. Do you know the one about the cricket ball in the eye? Good to see you looking better.

  2. I love how you take all your mishaps in stride! Humor is the best medicine for sure. You made me laugh out loud with your funny sayings about aging. Your face is looking better. Hope it continues to heal without any side effects
    dwight

  3. Jan, your blessed storytelling reminds me of the whopper of a trout caught on the Madison when I was a boy. The only problem . . . I didn’t catch it, my good friend did!

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